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I recently made the painful decision to pull away from someone who has been one of my closest friends. This person did something extremely dishonest and unloving and, although the love is still there, the trust is gone. Even though I miss the friendship I know this is the right decision.
The whole situation proves, once again, that relationships are our most profound classrooms. Now that I’ve gained some distance I can see what a terribly noisy relationship this was. What I mean by that is that this person always has a lot of drama swirling around her and, against my norm, I allowed myself to get wrapped up in it. The uncomfortable truth is that she fed my ego and vice versa. I have no doubt that there is genuine love between us, but there is also no doubt that out relationship wasn’t completely healthy. I knew I was acting unwisely when I put myself into a position of dependency on her but I did it anyway. And I paid for it. And it hurt in more ways than one.
Now that the noise has quieted the most amazing thing is happening. Into that void is flowing the voice of Spirit. I am hearing my own Higher Self, far more directly and more often. The plain truth is no other person can ever fill our need to develop a deep, honest relationship with ourselves.
Noisy, co-dependent relationships keep us identified with voices and opinions of ourselves that are not really ours. They are just an attempt by our small, ego self to distract us from our True Self, in all it’s magnificence.
Today, I respect myself enough to prioritize my inner relationship. Today I am listening to, and valuing, me.
I am worthy of developing my whole self.
I am worthy.
Cylvia Hayes
#CylviaHayes #Empowerment #ResiliencyMuscles
Wow. Well said. In the past, I was so confused by one person in particular who I had known since we were very young and I loved deeply and who I thought loved me yet, as time went on, she did/said hurtful (or, as you wrote, unloving) things to me. After a while, it felt abusive, and so, in anger, I abruptly cut off the relationship. I have learned from that painful experience, to lovingly detach and let go. While that was very difficult and heart-wrenching, it allowed room for healthy and loving friendships to enter my life which are life affirming and enriching. Thank you writing this post. It has helped me to further process and understand that important relationship.
Hi Michelle. So glad the post had some value for you. That certainly was an important relationship. Sometimes we have to shed the old to make room for new growth and new skin. Ideally, we can do so without anger and with forgiveness, but even when we miss that mark there is massive learning to be had in relationship ebbs and flows. All the very best to you.