Are you working through some big challenges just now? Has life smacked you right off your feet? Does what’s before you look big, tough, overwhelming? Well it might be time for a little well-placed denial.
Denial gets a bad rap in pop culture and psychology. It’s usually used to say someone isn’t facing reality. I’ve a whole new powerful take on denial. It’s about looking at the situation in front of you, taking control of your thoughts and choosing not to give the challenge more power than it really has. The more we feed into the seeming problem the bigger it appears. Denial can cut it back down to size.
I’ll give a couple of examples that I am personally dealing with right now. I’m going through some significant financial issues and it’s easy to slip into a lot of uncertainty and insecurity around it. However, when I really look at the situation, yes, I have some income and cash flow challenges and the remnants of some big legal proceedings, but I ALSO have a tremendous amount of actual resources flowing to me – supportive people, new business opportunities, paid business travel.
So, each time I start getting wrapped up in worry I just gently deny the fear with, “The illusion of scarcity has no power in my life.”
This helps me stay calm and focused on the tasks that need to be done to actually deal with the financial issues.
A powerful one, two punch is to follow a focused denial with an empowered affirmation statement. I am working with, “Resources of all kinds flow to me in joyful abundance. I am a powerful prosperity generation and distribution center.”
This isn’t just about positive thinking, it’s about disciplined thinking. It’s about flipping our focus and staying open to the much broader perspectives that always surround challenging situations.
Here’s another example. A business colleague of mine is being unreliable and failing to deliver on some important projects. I have a lot riding on this work and can easily feel out of control and fearful not being able to get a response from this person. However, the broader truth is this person isn’t responsible for my success. So when I start to feel those stress spikes I state, “ My friend’s unreliable behavior cannot harm me.” And, because I genuinely care for this person and know that some of the behavior is because they are having their own life challenges right now, I affirm, “The love and positive intention behind this work and our relationship ensures a positive outcome for both of us.” Next time, I may choose a different business arrangement but for now there is nothing to lose by staying focused on the intended outcome and waiting for the response to my attempts to communicate.
Our minds, what we focus on and how we frame our thoughts absolutely dictate our reality. Thoughts trigger feelings (and vice versa) which means even if they don’t create the circumstances of our lives, they definitely DO create how we experience those circumstances. You literally HAVE THE POWER TO CHOOSE YOUR EXPERIENCES in life! Let that sink in.
Your past has no power over you.
Old traumas have no power over you.
Attackers, abusers, abandoners and bullies have no power over you.
You are on an epic journey through some tough stuff. In all great struggles the hero faces a point in which she can either run away or face the villain and say, “You are not all that! You are not more powerful than I am.” Now THAT is a powerful denial.
You are more powerful than you realize. You got this.
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